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It’s no news that an increasing number of individuals are deliberately opting not to have children these days.
Furthermore, despite the fact that some people still think it was introduced by younger generations—millennials are now eye-rolling—that isn’t really the case.
The choice has been shared by many members of generation X, defined as individuals born between the middle of the 1960s and the beginning of the 1980s.
Gen Xers, who fall between baby boomers and millennials, are renowned for learning the importance of independence and work-life balance due to their lack of parental supervision. Some of them are also content with their childless lives.
The question, “People over 50 who chose to be childfree, do you regret your decision?” was posed. On r/AskReddit, the question “Why or why not?” quickly became a really fascinating topic.
Some of the more insightful responses that clarify the choice and present it in a whole different way than you may have previously considered are included here.
I’m 55 (F), and I’ve never desired kids. I just don’t like them, and becoming a mother for more than 20 years sounded—and still does—like a jail term. For dogs and cats, maternal af, but for little humans? Not a chance.
And I’m glad I don’t have any kids. There is no other way I could see my existence.
You know the sensation you get when you’re eager to teach your child how to play baseball? the’s how I describe it to folks.
or anything else you’d want to tell them? I don’t possess it. In essence, it’s a lack of parental intuition. I never dreamed of having children. It’s the same with my SO.
Please understand that I have nothing against kids. And when someone hurts or mistreats them, I become incredibly upset. I just never desired to have my own.
Not at all. I’ve never thought I’d make a decent parent. Although I don’t believe I would have physically abused someone.
I have a short fuse, and my words and voice would have been harsh, much like my own father.” “I wouldn’t want to expose any kid to that kind of parenting since I wasn’t happy growing up with that sort mom.
Bored Panda interviewed Zoë Noble, the creator of the “We Are Childfree” community, which celebrates childfree lives one tale at a time, to learn more about the childfree lifestyle that an increasing number of individuals are choosing these days.
“Being a parent is the norm in our society. “Everyone just has children because that’s just what ‘everyone’ does,” Zoë informed us, adding that it’s not a deliberate choice or option and isn’t even apparent.
Childfree individuals, maybe for the first time, contest that notion and present it to the public. She said, “And that makes people uncomfortable.”
“If it’s not a requirement, or even a good idea, for everyone to have children, then that raises questions about parenting, motherhood especially, and sex, sexuality, gender.
so many of the assumptions that our patriarchal, capitalist, religious, heteronormative world is built on,” stated the author of “We Are Childfree.”
“You’re supposed to have a bunch of good reasons, to be able to justify and defend yourself in a way that those who follow the script never have to,” Zoë said, referring to a viewpoint that is nevertheless seen as extreme by mainstream culture.
For years, my wife was employed at a nursing facility. Consider the fact that more than 95% of elderly persons never get family visits.
People want a piece of the pie till they pass away. The entire “well, who is going to visit you or take care of you when you’re older” argument is total bullsh*t, I discovered at this point.
After that, we made the decision to never have children again. toured the globe and made wonderful friends. No regrets.
Despite our long-standing decision to forgo having children, my wife and I have always kept the option open.
At forty, we have no regrets whatsoever about not having children. For us, it still seems like the proper decision. Hopefully, we will continue to feel that way for a very long time.
“Who will take care of you when you’re old?” is one of the many questions people ask us. and “what if something happens to your spouse?”
We don’t want to be judgmental, but they have always seemed like quite self-serving justifications for having kids.
F(56) No, I’m not sorry. I’m just a loner at heart, and I like spending time with my kitties. “And that’s great—and some people, a far smaller number, just don’t want to—and that’s great too.”
Zoë remarked, acknowledging that the majority of people just want to have children. People have learnt to appreciate one another’s personal decisions, therefore I’d want for us to reach a point where initiatives like We are Childfree are no longer necessary.
The author said that Zoë always knew she didn’t want children when asked how she came to the decision to live a childfree life.
“I was afraid to live my truth and felt alone in my emotions. I had heard that women without children are aloof, self-centered, and fixated on their careers, and I was afraid that others would feel the same way about me.
The lady said, “I kept that part of me hidden, tucked away in the back of my mind, because I didn’t see anyone like me in my life or in the media growing up.”
I’m fifty-two and sitting in bed with a book and a cup of tea, admiring the morning sky over the ocean.
No one is requesting food, a diaper change, the vehicle, or to sleep in my bed, and the music is quiet.
Later I shall wander around a museum without a stroller, a melancholy tween, or a crying, hungry, wet infant.
Yes, the children might behave sometimes, but what is the percentage? A vegan, someone who only eats chicken nuggets, and someone who would burn water if I allow them near a saucepan are all people who BI will cook for.
Not at all. I never lost sleep, leisure time, or the majority of my income because I felt the need to change diapers. The children of others are wonderful. primarily because they belong to other individuals.
I respond to inquiries about “who will take care of you when you’re old” by saying that I want to adopt a 40-year-old when I’m 75.
I am 57 years old and have no children. I have no regrets about that. I really think I would have been a terrible mother.
Being an absolute introvert, I was persuaded that my choice was the right one when I saw my sister with her sprogs always clinging to her, begging for food, attention, a toy, or anything else, and yelling, “Mommy, mommy, mommy.”
I would have been pushed to murder or suicide very quickly if I had kids. I like my sister’s children, who have grown into amazing young people, but I need a lot of alone time to be sane, and you can’t get that from children.
Had I had them, I could have turned into one of those dreadful people who give their children Benadryl to put them to sleep so they can have some quiet. I prefer not having children.
At about 30, Zoë’s life took a drastic turn when she relocated from London to Berlin, Germany. “I developed the self-assurance to accept my true self.
As soon as I began to publicly declare that I didn’t want children, a burden was removed. With We are Childfree.
I want to encourage individuals to live genuinely, love who they are, and stand in their truth—to know that they are not alone and that there is nothing wrong with them.
Being childless, according to Zoë, has allowed her to follow a meaningful life path and the freedom to alter course when it is convenient for her.
It has allowed me to travel as much as I want, change occupations, and relocate to a different nation. Parents can still do such things, but it’s more difficult,” she said.
“Not having children has allowed me to pursue that sense of adventure, and I love that I don’t know what my life will end up looking like,” Zoë said.
No. When I consented to marry my spouse, I was aware of what I was getting into. He had a vasectomy and two boys from his first marriage.
Since I was so young (he is ten years older), he was concerned. After giving it some real thought, I decided that I preferred a life with him rather than one without him, but maybe with a kid I hadn’t even had yet.
We’ve been together for 26 years, so everything worked out for us. I also have nine grandkids. Enjoy all the enjoyment without having to do the raising labor!
Yes, I agree; it took me years to fully accept the fact that I had no desire to have children. I first believed that the desire would miraculously grow as I grew older.
Later, I believed that I was mentally ill and that I needed to “talk myself into it” or have a child in the hopes that the sensation would materialize.
However, I am already in my mid-thirties and still have no desire to have children. I’m often asked “why” I don’t want children.
Like, there are a hundred reasons why. However, “because I don’t want them” is the most significant justification. In other words, “I don’t WANT them” In other words, I just don’t actively desire it.
Why would I make myself do something I don’t naturally want to do? It seems like a fantastic way to ruin some poor kids’ lives and mine.
No, and I’ve discovered someone who shares my sentiments. We are the hip uncle and aunt.
Additionally, Bored Panda was interested in the opinions of a Redditor who goes by the handle IBeTrippin and has chosen to live childfree.
“I explain it to people like this—you know that feeling you get where you just can’t wait to teach your kid how to play baseball?” the Redditor commented in response to the topic.
or anything else you would want to tell them? I don’t possess it. In essence, there is a lack of parental instinct.
I never dreamed of having children. It’s the same with my SO. Please understand that I have nothing against kids.
And when someone hurts or mistreats them, I become incredibly upset. I just never desired to have my own.
I have no regrets at the age of 57. When we first started dating, my husband believed he wanted children, but he is now also very content that we never had any.
It has made our lives more debt-free, tranquil, and free. It’s so much nicer to have the freedom to choose how we want to live.
Additionally, I don’t believe that parents should have children only to have insurance coverage for their later years.
I don’t think any kid is thankful to have been born in this world given what is undoubtedly going to happen as a result of climate change, and it is immoral to bring other people into the world with the assumption that they would help you when you need them.
I regret that I wasn’t in a relationship that was healthy enough for me to feel that I COULD have children, but I don’t really regret not having kids.
I regret not having the strength to escape the abuse sooner; maybe I could have at least had the option if I had been stronger.
The best choice I’ve ever made. But it wanted information more than a choice. I didn’t picture having children in my future and never desired them, therefore I knew from a very young age that I wouldn’t have any. I adore my alone, self-centered existence! Do as I want, when I please.
According to IBeTrippin, they have never been under pressure to deal with kids. “There might be in some families, and I can understand that, but not in mine.” ”
Neither of us was particularly interested in having children,” the Redditor added in reference to the choice to forgo having children.
We didn’t talk about it or decide to do anything about it. It was just the way things were. The Redditor responded that “certainly there would have been some career choice differences for stability” when asked how their lives would have been if they had children.
However, IBeTrippin pointed out that, contrary to what is often believed in our culture, “we weren’t choosing not to have children so that we could live out some fantastic carefree life of travel and adventure.”
The reason for this was that neither of us wanted to have children. We didn’t find it appealing,” the Redditor said.
Not at all. I knew I didn’t want to have children by the time I was in my twenties. never experienced the mythical biological clock going off.
I’m happy to have lived a life free from arithmetic assignments, school bullies, and—above all—having to be accountable.
Despite my desire, I was unable to have children. For years, I felt remorse, but today I’m at peace. I’m 64 years old.
I have been happily married for almost thirty years, am in my sixties, and am childless. I’m mostly pleased with our choice.
Both my spouse and I sometimes wish that things had turned out differently and that we had a reliable companion to support us as we age. Our reasons for not having children, however, remain the same.
Both of us saw that the world was heading in an unsustainable path. Ecologically unsound techniques were the focus, while research on global climate change was not.
Both of us come from households with a large number of kids and grandchildren. As a result, our genes will be represented without using more resources.
We didn’t want our kids to go through what we had gone through—being teased about our looks. We didn’t want to take the chance since we had both been exposed to higher than usual quantities of radiation.
For my part, I was worried about being a decent father. (In contrast, my hubby would have been fantastic.)
I believed that I was too old by the time we could afford to have children. I would never have informed my 40-year-old mother, who had five children before me and one after.
That some of us didn’t get the same amount of care and attention as her oldest. I didn’t want to harm someone else in that way.
Therefore, rather of producing children, we helped those who were already here in a variety of ways. Although we ultimately wish the situation had been different, we generally do not regret our choice.